


Straight Off The Page

by writingonpostcards



Series: Tumblr Ficlets - Check, Please! [16]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Author!Bitty, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-09
Updated: 2017-11-09
Packaged: 2019-01-31 03:38:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12673635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingonpostcards/pseuds/writingonpostcards
Summary: au where bitty writes trashy historical gay romance novels that jack discovers by accident and after reading each one sends bitty a letter describing all the historical inaccuracies





	Straight Off The Page

**Author's Note:**

> based on [this prompt](http://kirkaut.tumblr.com/post/147066750267/au-where-bitty-writes-trashy-historical-gay)

“Lardo!” Bitty yells down the corridor to his roommate-slash-publisher.

“Yeah?” Lardo comes into Bitty’s room with a plate of half-eaten pie.

“You need to fix your screening process or something because this letter is just entirely criticism.”

“There’s a compliment there.” Lardo shoves a forkful of pie into her mouth.

“One compliment to _seven pages of critique_ ,” Bitty stresses as he flips through the essay on his latest novel. Bitty gets to the bottom of the last page, finds the one sentence compliment, and underneath it something even better. Contact information.

Bitty’s phone is out and ringing before Lardo finishes her mouthful.

“What are you doing?” She asks after swallowing.

“Calling this man and demanding an explanation.”

Lardo’s eyes widen and she hastily drops her plate onto Bitty’s table. “That’s a bad idea, Bitty. Hang up. You’re too close to this.”

Bitty spins away from Lardo, who tries reaching around him for the phone. Bitty holds her away with a hand to her forehead.

The phone stops ringing.

“Hello, is this Jack Zimmermann?” Bitty poked his tongue out at Lardo. Lardo throws her hands in the air and shakes her head at Bitty. “Great, well this is Eric Bittle… Yes, the author. I received your letter… Yes, I read it all, which is why I’m calling. I think it’s very… Well the stories are really more about the relationships… No, I don’t think it does… Yes, I would… Well fine. Okay… Text me where.”

Bitty hangs up and turns back to face Lardo.

“Bitty?” She says slowly. “What happened?”

“I am going to meet this Jack Zimmermann face to face,” Bitty declares. His phone pings with a text.

_Annie’s on Park Street. Tomorrow. 11am._

-

Bitty’s had the night to think it over and he’s come to the conclusion that he never should have rung Jack. It was terribly rude, Jack was just trying to be helpful, and honestly, Bitty’s feeling a little embarrassed sitting here in Annie’s waiting for a stranger to come up to him.

He’s not going to demand his explanation. He’s just going to apologise, pay for them to get a coffee, and then leave.

Or at least, he is until Jack actually turns up and Bitty’s whole body shivers. Internally only, thank goodness.

Jack is, almost quite literally, straight out of the pages of Bitty’s books. Meaning, he’s Bitty’s type. Meaning, Bitty is now blushing and he can’t remember his last name.

Jack sits on the stool next to him at the counter. “Eric Bittle?”

Eric nods jerkily. “You must be Jack.”

“That’s right. I–”

“Look, Jack, I’m so sorry for calling you last night, it was very inconsiderate of me, and so I wanted to apologise for that, and buy you a coffee, and then I’ll leave you alone for the rest of your life.”

Bitty exhales the scant amount of breath he had left in him after his outburst. Then he looks at Jack, because he realised he delivered that whole speech to the display case of pastries.

Jack looks… well, _gorgeous up close_ is what Bitty thinks first, but he also looks amused.

“Bit of an assumption, eh?” He says with a pretty smile.

“What’s an assumption?”

“That I won’t want to see you for the rest of my life.”

Bitty’s mouth drops open at Jack’s forwardness. It’s almost outright flirting, and while Bitty’s characters may converse like that more often than not, it’s unexpected to hear it in real life.

“I was, uh, looking forward to talking about your books with you,” Jack continues in a more earnest tone.

“Well that’s…” Bitty shuffles on his chair. “Hang on. Books? You’ve read more than one?”

“I’ve read all of them,” Jack says with a shrug.

“All of–”

Jack nods.

“Oh my lord. That’s…“ Bitty isn’t actually sure what is it. He might just be talking to his biggest fan. Who he half-insulted last night and who he still hasn’t bought a coffee for.

“Sorry, if that makes you uncomfortable.”

Bitty blinks at Jack and realises he’s been silent for several moments while his thoughts rearranged themselves. He over-corrects, of course.

“No, Jack,” Bitty says grabbing Jack’s wrist. “That’s why I write the books. So folks like you can read them and, and enjoy them. I hope. Do you?”

“Yes. Of course.” Jack nods and his hair falls further across his forehead, making Bitty’s stomach flop over.

“Could I get you a coffee? A pastry too. What do you like?” Bitty stands up, and pulls out his wallet.

“Oh! You don’t have to. I really would be fine with just talking.”

“Nonsense, we’re in a coffee shop and I’m not leaving until we’ve both had a coffee at least.”

“Well… alright then.”

Bitty orders them coffee and cakes and takes a few extra seconds at the till to send Lardo a string of emojis via text to convey his mood.

Then he readies himself to go and charm the pants off—no, no, not thinking of it like _that_ in a public place—Mr. Jack Zimmermann.

They do talk about the books, but only for a little bit before it tangents off into the story of how Jack found Bitty’s books which tangents off into a story about a holiday abroad which tangents of to a shared love of travel shows and so on and so forth.

Bitty’s coffee is cold by the time he gets around to drinking any of it, and he tries to chase away the strange aftertaste of it with his cake.

“Ugh, I don’t know why I do it to myself.” Bitty stares forlornly at the orange and pistachio friand he’s just taken a bite of.

“Do what?”

“Buy baked goods from places like this and expect them to be better than mine.”

Jack raises his eyebrows at Bitty, then reaches for the friand. “Can I?”

Bitty gestures for him to go ahead.

Jack takes a small bite, chews, swallows. “It tastes pretty good to me.”

“Because you haven’t tried _mine_. I could whip up a batch in half an hour and then you’d know what I’m talking about.”

“Okay.” Jack drops the friand and grabs a napkin, wiping his hands.

“Pardon?”

“Let’s go see whether yours are better.”

Bitty turns on his stool so he’s facing Jack directly. “Are you inviting yourself over to my place?”

“You offered first,” Jack points out with a smile.

“Only tangentially,” Bitty counters.

“Sometimes that’s enough.”

Bitty thinks about what to do. On the one hand, here is Jack, rudely inviting himself to Bitty’s place of residence to have Bitty cook for him. On the other hand, Jack is inviting Bitty to spend more time with him and do something that Bitty really loves to do.

If Bitty hadn’t come to be quite interested in Jack over their coffee, he’d have a very different answer, but as it is, he grins and stands up.

“Alright, mister. Follow me, and prepare to never be able to eat non-Bitty baked goods ever again.”

Jack’s smile widens and he’s up standing next to Bitty in the blink of an eye.

Bitty sends Lardo a warning text and gets chirps back in response, as well as the assurance she’ll be out the house for at least two hours so Bitty can be _thoroughly corrected on his historical inaccuracies_.

The friands do get baked, eventually.

Then, after a series of conversations, Jack becomes Bitty’s historical liaison for his novels. Also his boyfriend.

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted to [tumblr](http://17piesinseptember.tumblr.com/post/151767690505/kirkaut-au-where-bitty-writes-trashy-historical)


End file.
